


Sticky Fingers

by Dollianna



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Accidental Stimulation, Anal Fingering, Consensual Non-Consent, F/M, Fingering, M/M, Masturbation, Menstruation, Sexsomnia, Sexual Tension, Team Bonding, Vaginal Fingering, ereri, sexual content and situations
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-17
Updated: 2015-09-28
Packaged: 2018-04-04 19:44:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4150461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dollianna/pseuds/Dollianna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Petra's long held secret about Captain Levi is about to be blown due to the unexpected arrival of her "Aunt Flo". Eren, although not thrilled, is happy to help a friend in need. Too bad he's going to have to get hard to fix such a sticky situation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

 

Although the evening sun was slowly setting, Petra could still feel its heat beating down on her, causing her shirt to stick to her sweaty back. Crouched by the trickling stream, she wiped her forehead with the back of her arm and continued with the task at hand. How did things get to this? How did her situation get so out of hand?

_What am I going to do?_

As she swung a flat stone against her blood stained panties, her arms and legs screamed out in pain. She’d been at this for twenty minutes straight, striking and scrubbing at her underwear that sat under the cool water, drowning herself in the task of getting them clean. Crouching did nothing to alleviate the cramps rolling throughout her midsection, and the heat had completely soured her already poor mood.

“Forget it!” Petra screamed while abruptly standing up, “It’s no use!” She flung the stone across the clearing and watched it fly, aware that this too would do nothing to help out her worsening situation. But her predicament was so much more than the start of her period on a practice expedition- the whole discovery of Eren and his titan shifting abilities had thrown the three military branches into complete chaos, and who better to harbor such chaos than the Survey Corps. They were known for causing and asking for trouble.

So what was the difference this time?

Petra ran a hand through her damp hair and sighed.

The difference this time was that they were dealing with a human being who had some seriously amazing powers. It was completely unheard of that a human- a _young boy_ no less- could morph into the very thing destroying humanity. She shook her head. And of course the Captain just **_had_** to take him under his wing, which meant the Special Operation forces had no choice but to be completely involved as well. And what better way to get him acquainted with Survey Corps lifestyle than taking him out to the countryside and running some mock drills?

Alas, it was neither her period nor Eren that gave her so much trouble. The former was a lifelong friend that she had dealt with plenty of times while enlisted in the Survey Corps. She’d figure something out, and Eren wasn’t such a problem either. He was a quick learner who wanted to prove himself to the group. Polite, yet not very keen at reading people’s emotions, he was a good kid nonetheless.  No, the problem that was causing her so much grief was a secret she had wanted to take with her to the grave.

Unfortunately, her period had thrown a wrench in that plan, which in turn had made this trip anxiety-ridden and _unbearable_.

“Petra!” a voice called out. She turned and saw Eren emerge from the shrubbery, slightly sweaty but still upbeat. A slow, yet dejected smile grew on her face as she carefully shifted her body to cover the mess by her feet. “Captain Levi told me to come find you. It’s time for dinner.”

His beautiful clear eyes shone with admiration as he saluted Petra. ‘He’s so formal,’ she thought, ‘and so hardworking and determined.’

It was nice having that kind of energy around.

“Thank you Eren, I’ll be there in a minute or so.” Eren nodded but didn’t break salute or leave. Instead his thick brows furrowed in something akin to a mixture of confusion and concern. He opened his mouth but then closed it, looking away as if in thought. “Are you alright Eren? You don’t have to stay saluted.”

He jerked as if he was burned. “Oh! um, right! Sorry about that.” Petra waved him off.

“No need to apologize Eren, it’s not a big deal.” Although he had stopped saluting, Eren stayed rooted to the spot. He looked at Petra and frowned. By the way she had been acting all day, he just knew there was a problem. Petra was always the life of the group, laughing and chirping away at anything and everything- but today had been _much_ different. This being the second time Eren had been so far away from town, everything was still as breath taking as the first time he left; he could’ve only imagined what the outside world looked like beyond the walls. But whereas the first time they ran a practice expedition, Petra had been giving out unsolicited advice and pointers left and right, making sure Eren was not only comfortable with his new surroundings, but with the Special Operations team as well.

This time she had been quiet and stoic the entire ride there.

Oluo’s annoying jabs and petty insults throughout the trip fell on deaf ears, so there was **definitely** something up. Even Levi had raised a brow a few times at Petra’s lack of rebuttal.

 “Is everything okay Petra? You seem, uh…different today.”

“I do?” She swallowed a ball of building emotion and forced her smile even wider.

It hurt, a lot. As did her ovaries, and cervix, and vagina, and stomach, and everything else dealing with a woman’s reproductive system. Plus she needed to shit badly.

“No way, I’m totally fine. See?” she spun in a quick circle and choked out a giggle. “Totally fine.”

“Then what was that?” Eren asked while pointing at Petra’s feet. A chill ran up her spine.

“What was what?”

“What was that white thing? It looked like a cloth, and it was kinda red.” He looked up at her with even more concern this time and frowned. “Are you hurt?”

“Nope, I’m fit as a fiddle. Spry as a new recruit! Now let’s go get some dinner- I’m starving, and Eld cooked so you know it’s gonna be good!” As Petra practically sprinted towards him, he looked past her and honed in on her panties. At first glance it looked like a bloody cloth, but upon closer inspection, Eren flinched backwards and nearly fell over. He caught himself and could clearly feel the blood initially drain from his face, and then rush right back into his cheeks.

“I, I-I…um, Petra I’m **so** sorry…” Eren couldn’t even string a proper sentence together, much less make eye contact with his superior. “I-I won’t tell…I’m **so** sorry!” Walking past him and picking up her unmentionables, Petra sighed again and wrung them out over the creek, watching as the blood droplets practically disappeared in the clear water.

Nothing could top the time the Captain pulled her aside to alert her of blood seeping through her pants, so she shrugged and turned around. A genuine smile crossed her face along with a lighthearted laugh. Petra wasn’t embarrassed in the slightest and instead felt a spark of joy at the horror that was written all over Eren’s face. Her laughter began and increased until Eren stopped covering his beet red face.

“Well that’s what you get for being nosy!” She teased, bumping against him, “Besides, didn’t they teach you recruits what a period was during training?”

Eren, though still blushing, backed up and saluted again. There had been numerous classes and discussions about puberty and the menstrual cycles that occurred in women. While a large percentage of the female soldiers wouldn’t ovulate, as the food sources didn’t allow for proper nutrition, many of them still would and did. He remembered Mikasa being pulled aside and given the tools needed to deal with it every month, and also taught how to track her cycle so she could be prepared. Eren only had the highest respect and regard for female soldiers serving while menstruating, especially because the military’s budget really didn’t allow for proper sanitation tools and techniques.

As he continued his salute, Eren bowed and returned to see a surprised Petra. He could only smile.

 “Thank you for serving and being helpful even when you have to worry about other, more important things. It means a lot to me and to the group even when we don’t realize it.”

“I, uh…thank you.” Her cheeks heated up and her stomach fluttered. Most men hated even thinking about periods much less talking about them, yet here Eren was praising her for dealing with a bodily function on top of numerous duties. It was…nice. Nice to get recognition and respect for something so difficult to deal with on such limited resources.

And it also made her hope- hope that maybe Eren would be willing to help her out with what was really troubling her.

Fumbling with the underwear, Petra sat down and patted the ground next to her. It was now or never, and Eren was literally her last chance at protecting her deep dark secret she had held onto for years. He raised and brow but did as he was instructed.

“Eren, I…I have a favor to ask of you.” He sat across from her and looked into her deep amber gaze. All traces and laughter and embarrassment gone. “By no means do you have to agree, and by no means are you to tell anyone about this, even the Captain.”

“Even the Captain?” he asked incredulously. Petra solemnly nodded.

“ _Especially_ the Captain.”

The young teen was quiet for a moment while weighing his options. Petra was reliable, and if she was keeping a secret from Captain Levi then was definitely for a good cause. And he didn’t have a reason _not_ to help her out considering all she had done for him to feel welcomed. Eren nodded and decided then and there to help his superior out anyway he could.

“Alright, I’m in.”

“But I haven’t told you anything about it yet.” Eren shook his head and leveled an intense stare at her, hands gripping onto his crossed legs.

“It doesn’t matter. I figure you have a good reason for whatever this is, and I trust that you are only doing this to benefit the team. So I’m going to help you out no matter what.” It was Petra’s turn to nod as she lowered her gaze; it would be nice to share this secret with someone, especially someone who trusted in her judgement. Maybe…just maybe, they could turn this predicament into a solution. It was worth a shot, because Petra had nothing to lose and was literally up shit creek without a paddle.

“Eren,” she began slowly, meeting his eyes once again, “do you know what fingering is?”  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo, kind of weird, even gross, but possibly give it a chance? The meat of the story will come in chapters 2&3\. Thank you for reading :D


	2. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Tosses 50 gazillion trillion excuses at anybody who still wants to read this trash*   
> I'm sorry for such a delayed update, but that's life for you :'(

As the muggy afternoon transitioned into evening, darkness surrounded the campsite with only a fire providing some light. The humidity had been so overwhelming that everyone, even the notoriously clean Captain Levi, had broken into a sticky sweat, causing his mood to sour rapidly. As soon as dinner had been eaten, he immediately began setting up the tents with Eld and Gunther, leaving Petra, Eren, and Oluo on cleanup duty. It was when Eren began drying the freshly cleaned dishes did he really start to sweat, and for a whole other reason entirely.

Sitting on a stump, the teen looked across the glowing fire and watched Petra mapping out the return ride home, cross legged and looking like a warm, beautiful ember goddess. He couldn’t get their earlier conversation out of his head, and kind of wished he hadn’t of bothered with her business in the first place. It was Oluo elbowing him in his side that brought him back to the present, and the impending near future.

“Sexy, huh?” Oluo whispered while wriggling his almost non-existent eyebrows. Eren flushed and averted his gaze.

“Shut up…and help me with the dishes already! You’ve done nothing but joke around all day!” Oluo gave an ugly cackle and clapped a rough hand on Eren’s back, laughing at the young boy’s reaction. He was certainly _green_ in the area of the opposite sex, at least on a physical level no doubt.

“Come on, it’s only natural to be attracted to pretty things,” Oluo said, “Isn’t that right Petra?” Without even glancing up from the map, Petra waved him off like an annoying fly.

“I have no idea what your ugly mouth is going on about, but do as Eren says and help him out.”

“Pfft, you didn’t think my mouth was ugly the other night.” This time she looked up and chucked the compass right at his head, landing a direct hit on his right temple. Hopefully it would leave a nasty welt that would remind him in the coming days not to shoot his mouth off with lies.

“I don’t need to remind you, but Eren, take everything he says with a grain of salt.” She got up from her spot and stretched, then came over to retrieve her compass turned assault weapon. Oluo got up from his stump and whimpered to the other side of the camp where the others were setting up the tents. Sitting down on the open spot, she soon leveled a calm look at Eren and sadly smiled.

“Are you ready for tonight? Or… or have you changed your mind?” The shift in atmosphere was so sudden he didn’t have time to recover. Eren just knew nothing would get him ready for what would, well, _could_ happen tonight between him, Petra, and the Captain. Anything would’ve been better than laying up in the tent with Levi- **_anything_**. Dissection, torture, being withheld food, water boarding, sex slavery... well, no, not that far, but literally anything moderately unpleasant would be preferable then the upcoming evening with the captain.

“Eren? Eren please answer me. Just let me know if you can’t do this.” Petra placed a soft had on his thigh and visibly swallowed hard, tears fighting to come out, brows furrowed. “You don’t have to do this…I’ll figure something else out.”

No, he had to do this. Her hand shaking on his thigh was all the push he needed to get past his worries.

“I said I’d help and I meant it.” He grabbed her hand with his own and gave it a hard squeeze, relishing in the softness of it. “We’re in this together, right? You can’t do this alone and we can’t let Captain’s secret out, especially when you have guarded it for so long, especially from _him_.” Petra nodded and wiped at her eyes, composing herself the best she could. Yeah, initially things had been hectic when Eren had been thrusted into the care of the Special Operations Squad, but it was at this moment Petra had never been more grateful to him and his kindness. He was special, and that was regardless of his titan shifting abilities.

Taking a deep breath and returning a reassuring squeeze, Petra squared her shoulders and strengthened her resolve. It was now or never, sink or swim.

“Alright then,” she started, “Let’s go over the plan one more time.”

x o x o

**A few hours earlier…**

_“Fingering?” Eren echoed, “I’ve never heard of that before.” Petra’s face flushed as she averted her gaze from his, feeling like a filthy pervert corrupting the youth, which, technically, she supposed she was. Still sitting cross legged on the ground with her subordinate, Petra slowed her breathing and honed in on the noises going on around them. This technique was her go-to whenever her panicky nature arose. It had gotten her out of countless encounters when expeditions had gone south and the death toll had begun to breathe down her neck._

_The stream she had just been using to lift bloody stains from her underwear gurgled softly and continuously, sloshing over the rocks and pebbles that laid beneath it. Naturally, wildlife flocked and built their lives around the abundant water source; birds chirping along the foliage, squirrels and their rodent counterparts scurrying over the rough trees and branches, and cicadas lying in wait to begin their evening songs. And although the humidity was at an all-time high, there was still a slight, warm breeze that came by every so often rustling the trees in its wake._

_This wasn’t about her. It was, but it truly wasn’t. It was about keeping the Captain, no, one of the most important people in her life safe and unaware of something that was completely uncontrollable. And damn her to hell if it required some outside help from an underage teenage boy that would never truly get a chance to experience his puberty for what it was- awkward and messy._

_Because obviously there were bigger issues to be had, like Titans on the brink of destroying humanity._

_Her other comrades wouldn’t understand had she asked them for help prior to this, and they certainly had no delicacy when it came to situations like this in the first place. And Petra really didn’t want the secret to spread in circles Levi spent most of his time in anyway, much less to the whole of the Survey Corps._

_And if he found out, hell, if anybody else found out, Levi would never look at Petra or himself the same way again- **ever** again, and she wouldn’t have any of that._

_“Eren,” she slowly began, face still red and eyes still averted to anything but his, “fingering is when a man… err, no, when another, uh, **person** , touches you.” Bless his heart to pieces, the poor thing raised a confused brow._

_“What? That’s all? Then I’ve done that about million times with my sister! And more so with my best friend Armin!” Petra snapped her head up, face brighter than a lobster._

_She needed to cut the crap, and fast._

_“No, no, Eren, no.” She scratched her cheek and looked up at the cloudless sky, tinted orange from the setting sun._

_How to put this delicately…_

_“I’m sorry, I didn’t explain that clearly enough. That wasn’t right…” she paused and quickly looked around, snatching up a nearby twig. Drawing a picture would help. Scooting backwards, now tucking her legs underneath her, Eren watched as she began drawing what looked like a diagram of something. Starting over a few times until she was content, he then watched as she drew an arrow to a single part. “Come to my side.”_

_“Okay. Hmmm…that looks kinda familiar.” he said._

_“Well, it should,” she began, “it’s a poor rendition of a female’s reproductive system that should’ve been taught to you during training.” As he sat down, Eren could begin to see the different structures that he learned about before and tried to remember the names as best as he could._

_“Uh, well what does this have to do with ‘fingering’?”_

_“Pretty much everything. Fingering, in the case of a woman with a vagina, is partially concentrated here, along with the vaginal opening.” She pointed at the clitoris, “Do you remember this? It’s called the clit and contains thousands of sensitive nerve endings specifically designed for sexual stimulation.”_

_“Oh my god…” Eren’s face began draining of color. “Oh, my, god.” Petra solemnly looked away, seeing him quickly grasp the concept._

_Licking his lips, he turned to face her and began his interrogation. Why did he need to know about this? Why was she teaching him stuff like this? Did he want him to do this to her? Wasn’t that sexual harassment? Was someone in the group sexually harassing her? Why couldn’t they tell Captain Levi? Did she have an issue with her clitoris? Why couldn’t the captain know about this? Was Oluo doing something lewd when nobody was around? Was another Squad Leader fingering her without consent? And why did she say they couldn’t tell the captain? Why couldn’t the captain **know** about this?!_

_“Eren, stop! Stop!” She threw the stick down and faced him. “Nothing like that has happened, it’s not like that.”_

_“Then what is it?! W-why are you talking about this? It’s weird, okay? I, I don’t want to talk about this anymore! You’re freaking me out!” His face and voice cracked, clearly exposing his mounting uneasiness._

_“Alright, calm down...calm down.” Petra began in a soothing tone, “I know this is a little weird, but please just hear me out. Okay?”_

_“B-but!”_

_“No buts! Just listen if you are still up to it. I need you to **listen**.” She waited for him to say something, waited for him to sprint off and tell the captain she was a mad woman that liked to sexually harass new recruits, waited for him to bite his thumb and book it to the innermost wall, choosing dissection over this, but he didn’t, and she was pleased to see him stay. “Eren, just hear me out all the way. Don’t interrupt, don’t ask questions, and don’t say anything until I am done. Agreed?” He swallowed hard, wiped his brow, but nodded none the less. _

_“Okay,” she took in a deep breath and exhaled, did so once more and finally began, “Eren, Captain Levi suffers from some sort of sleeping condition called ‘Sexsomnia’.” His mouth dropped but Petra held up a firm hand. “Remember our deal, no questions until after I’m finished.”_

_“I’m not 100% sure, but from what I gleaned from Squad Leader Hange’s medical books it seems like the closest diagnosis I could find for him.” Eren nodded and she continued, “Although there’s no research to speak of out there, the small definition I did find stated that a person, who is in the deepest stage of sleep, performs sexual activities to not only themselves, but also to those around them. And I’m almost certain it can vary in severity like any other standard disorder. You still with me?”_

_“Yeah…”_

_“Good. So, um, that brings me to say, that um…Captain Levi, he has, uh, you know, been fingering me in his sleep on pretty much all our mock and real expeditions ever since I joined his personal squad.” She let that sit for a second before moving on. “And even when we train outside of HQ and stay overnight, it still usually happens. I’m thinking that the disorder manifests even greater when he’s under a lot of pressure.” The sheer terror reflected in Eren’s eyes made Petra instantly go on the defensive, “But it’s not on purpose! He doesn’t **do** it on purpose! He doesn’t even know he’s doing it!”_

_“But how the hell would you even know?! What if he’s just pretending?” Eren asked, trying his damndest to keep anger from entering his voice._

_“He, he, he’s completely asleep when it happens- I **know** this! Captain Levi would never touch someone, much less his own subordinate that way! Especially without their consent! Think about it, he’s not that kind of person! He’s awkward when it comes to expressing himself emotionally. Even when he’s trying to get a standard point across, he still mucks it up. I’ve been keeping this a secret ever since he formed the Special Operations Squad!” She licked her chapped lips nervously and took in a shaky breath, “Captain Levi isn’t a dirty person, and I make sure on every single expedition, or training session, or whatever, that we are always in the same tent before lights go out; that he never does it to someone else! I don’t know if this happened with his team before us, and I don’t really care, but what I do care about is how he feels! If he ever found out he did this, that he did something like this to his subordinate, possibly past, but definitely present, he’d never trust anyone ever again. He’d never trust himself again, and he certainly wouldn’t forgive himself either.” _

_Tears she didn’t know she had been holding back spilled over her cheeks, causing her to cover her face in shame. It sounded so much worse out loud than it did in her head, and truly made her look like the scum of the earth. Eren must’ve though of her as trash to withhold such important information from the Captain, but Petra just never had the heart in her to tell him. She didn’t want to place yet another issue upon his already heavy shoulders._

_Shoulders that held much of humanity’s hopes and prayers._

_“I’m so sorry Eren,” Petra said through her hands and tears, “I’m so_ **so** _sorry!” She curled over and moved her hands to her sides, crying towards ground. She had initially thought telling someone about this pent up secret, one that wasn’t even hers to begin with, was going to be cathartic, but instead it only brought up feelings of shame and disgust. How dare she? How dare she withhold such information that was detrimental to all those involved?_

_It was only until she felt a warm hand on her back did she regain some control. She looked up through her tears and saw Eren’s determined, yet beautiful eyes staring straight at her._

_“If he touches you tonight, then there’s no way he won’t realize what he’s been doing, right? Your period will get on his hands…”_

_“I- uh, yes.” He removed his own hand and watched as Petra sat up, tear streaks staining her sweet face._

_“Then we have to do something. We can’t just sit here and let it happen…” His voice was cool and collected, nothing like before when they had first been looking at her diagram._

_“But Eren- don’t you hate me? Don’t you think I’m an awful person for keeping this a secret from him? For lying to him all this time?” He shook his head._

_“That’s not my place to judge. You are doing what you think is right, what you thought was right in the first place. The only thing we can do now, what I can do now, is help carry on Captain’s secret.” Petra looked down at her lap and sighed, not truly satisfied with his answer, but respected it nonetheless. And he was right- it was what she had thought was right at the time, and there was no going back. It was like the captain always said_ : Make choices without regrets.

_Looking at her intensely, Eren almost thought he could see Petra’s regrets and insecurities flowing all around her, clouding her previous judgement. Granted, while she had been telling her unbelievably strange “tale” he had been mad. Who was she in not telling Levi about his medical condition that had possibly not only affected her, but past subordinates close to him as well? It wasn’t right, and it wasn’t fair. But he also saw the genuine discomfort and sadness that reflected in her eyes too, and knew that her intentions had been good, although highly problematic._

_And when she broke into tears, Eren wanted to do anything to make them stop. Crying didn’t make him uncomfortable, he was a renowned cry baby in his circle of friends. No, it was the fact that **she** was the one crying. Her sobs tore at him in a way he’d never felt before. Petra was a kind hearted person, but it was something more than that, something almost foreign…_

_“Eren?” She had wiped her eyes and looked at him curiously, head tilted and eyes wide._

_“I! Um, I was wanting to ask you something.”_

_“Definitely, I’ve gone on plenty enough.” He picked at imaginary lint on his shirt and felt his face heating up again._

_“When Captain Levi, you know…touches you and stuff, what…what do you do? D-does it feel bad? Or are you upset, or do you, um, enjoy it?” Petra wrung her little hands together and turned away from him as well, cheeks tinted pink._

_“I, w-well… it feels nice? No, no, it actually feels pretty good.” She started, “I mean, I dunno, I trust him, so it makes it easy to deal with.” Eren stopped picking at imaginary lint and finally looked at her face. She was flushed and squirmed a bit. Possibly remembering from before?_

_“As for what I do, I just kinda lay as still as I can. It’s best not to try and fantasize about stuff you know gets you off. Otherwise you could start moaning or squirming and he would most definitely wake up.”_

_“Is he that good?” Petra’s flush deepened._

_“He is freaking amazing, which is super weird. For as awkward as he is in expressing his feelings while wide awake, he sure knows how to convey them in his sleep.”_

_“Huh...”_

_“But he is a very light sleeper, and it’s lucky if he can get three, maybe four hours of sleep on a regular night at headquarters. But when we’re out here,” she gently swung her arm around, “he tries his hardest to sleep the full six hours like everybody else.”_

_“Does he ever perform night watch duty?” Eren asked._

_“No, not on these practice sessions anyway. He wants us to be proficient at it so we can train other subordinates and new recruits. And you won’t either because of your abilities. We need you to be well rested and healthy so you can be in tip top shape.”_

_“I see…so what about if he wakes up midway through?” Petra cupped her cheek and looked to the sky, thinking for a bit._

_“He’s never woken up midway when he’s done it to me before. And he usually doesn’t do it all night, maybe two hours at most.”_

_“TWO HOURS??! Are you serious?! That’s painful for men!” Petra giggled and cracked a sly grin._

_“Just kidding, but it’d be painful for women too. No, he only touches for small intervals at a time, but kinda stops at one point or another. But when he stops for good he just, well, stops.”_

_“Not funny, but doesn’t his hand stay in your pants? How do you get it out without waking him, or without him knowing?” Petra abruptly flopped onto her back and assumed a sideways sleeping position. She was all too happy to demonstrate her “clever” solution._

_“Well, always, **always** before bed, I sneak off and clean down there like there’s no tomorrow. And if he ever finds out, there really wouldn’t be a tomorrow. But yeah, I scrub downstairs till it’s raw clean.”_

_“That doesn’t…sound safe?”_

_“Then, when he has paused for a significant amount of time, I start counting. If he doesn’t continue after ten minutes, then I continue with my old reliable “roll and snore method”. Totally full proof, hasn’t failed me yet.” Eren couldn’t even begin to describe his doubts._

_“Uh, I dunno Petra, do you think it’ll work for me? I mean, we do have different, uh, stuff down there. It might not be the same.” He paused and scrunched his face up._

_“Besides, this whole thing is sounding a bit exaggerated- over the top even…” A mix of disbelief and offense crossed her face._

_“Eren, first of all, it’s called genitalia, not ‘stuff’. Secondly, my good ol’ roll and snore hasn’t failed me, and it won’t fail you if you pay attention and believe in the technique.” Still on her side, she put up three fingers and huffed, “And I’ll have you know I don’t exaggerate to make myself look cool or to gain sympathy; I’m not Oluo for Maria’s sake. Had I been that dolt, Captain’s secret would’ve spread like wild fire among the three branches! What do you take me for- a military Police dog?!”_

_“Sorry, sorry.”_

_“Now listen up and be quiet! When Captain finishes, and you have properly counted the ten minutes- and that is_ **super** _important! Mess that up and you need to start over. Better safe than sorry, but once the time has been counted, and in my case, his fingers have dried up as much as they can-”_

_“Why the hell would his fingers be wet?” Eren interrupted, completely clueless to the fact that vaginas were not only moist and self-cleaning, but could also produce secretions from stimulation. Petra filed his question away for later when she had a chance to speak with the human sexuality trainers._

_“Never mind that, needless to say, when the time has passed you have to quickly, yet naturally, throw your body onto its stomach and snore as believable as possible. This will dislodge his hand from your “stuff” as you like to say, and provide you a small window of time to get into position. I quietly snore cause it seems more like me, but don’t stress too much or it’ll look strange.” Eren balked at the idea of rolling like that away from the Captain, and so forcefully no less._

_“But doesn’t that wake him up?! Then what’s the whole point?!” Petra nodded._

_“You **want** to wake him up because at that point his hand won’t be in your pants anymore, and it’ll just feel like you’ve been tossing and turning in your sleep all night.” She patted her shoulder proudly and beamed. “Like I said, it’s full proof.”_

_“But like **I** said, what if it’s not? What if when his hand is down there he wakes up? Or what if his shirt gets caught in my zipper, or our leg straps tangle when he’s…” Eren gulped and reddened, “when he’s spooning me? I’ll be in deep shit, not you.” _

_“I’m gonna be there by your side the whole time, and trust me, he won’t wake up. I’m not completely certain, but from the amount of times it has happened to me, he’s never woken up before, and I don’t think he’s going to start tonight just because he’s touching a penis over a vagina.”_

_Eren’s face clearly stated his lack of fondness and trust he had in the “plan”. The amount of security it offered him wasn’t even laughable; it didn’t exist. She’d be with him the whole time, but then what? It’s not like she could really do anything if something happened. Worst of all, Eren absolutely revered and respected Captain Levi and all he did for the Survey Corps and the shitty government that doubted him left to right. And now he was going to be felt up by his child hood hero?_

_There was just_ **no** _way._

_Petra could clearly read his thoughts and put a hand on his knee, smiling with newfound confidence. “Don’t worry Eren, I’ll be by your side the entire night, besides, I’ve seen how you’ve looked at the Captain before, you just might enjoy this more than you think you will.”_

o x o x

                The tents were finally pitched to Levi’s standards despite him being covered in a light film of his own sweat due to the awful humidity. With that task completed he was only too eager to head off to sleep, hoping the new day would bring less humid, if not cooler weather. Eld and Gunther were getting their bedding ready for the long night ahead of them, as was the whimpering Oluo who had just crossed the camp with a hand at his forehead and a pathetic expression to match.

“What’s wrong with you?” Levi asked in the flattest of tones, now regretting his decision in the first place. With a rolled up futon tucked under his other arm, Oluo pointed his nursing hand back at the campfire.

“Petra’s apparently on the rag, tossing shit at me like that. What am I, a dog? Who does she think she is? Who does she think _I_ am?” The Captain scoffed and rolled his eyes. At least she had perked up since that painfully annoying horse ride to the countryside earlier that day.

“Keep those kind of comments to yourself.”

As Oluo sulked off, still muttering to himself about something or another, Levi looked over at the subordinate in question and arched a thin brow. They were holding hands…

She and Eren had gotten a little _too_ friendly for his liking and it was starting to raise questions within the group. Granted, Petra had been reaching out to the teen, trying to make his transition to the Corps a little bit easier, but by the way the two had been acting all afternoon was beyond inappropriate- not even in the realm of helpful. The quick, furtive glances, the light blushes that would stain their cheeks whenever they accidentally made physical contact, or intentional contact, was becoming all too much. As were the flirty little giggles Petra freely made at Eren’s simple mistakes. Even now they looked like lovers comforting one another while whispering sweet nothings under the sliver of moon.

How irritating…

“Hey Captain, ready for lights out?” Eld asked. Without even averting his gaze from the two, Levi nodded.

“Right. Petra! Eren! Lights out!” Immediately their heads shot up and the strange look they gave him only added to the Captain’s growing irritation. Why did it look like they knew something that he didn’t? And why in the hell were they whispering even more intensely than before? Looking guilty, pitiful, and worried, the “lovebirds” had an enticing aura about them that made Levi question which one he liked looking at more. The amber eyed, heart faced Petra, or the “too pretty for his own good” Eren?

_What the hell am I thinking?!_

“Now! We haven’t got all day!”    

“You mean night. We haven’t got all night.” Oluo said, trying to be funny. The look that Levi cut towards him was just sharp enough to sober him up. “Sorry…”

Petra and Eren jogged over, faces still flushed from the campfire, and joined the rest of the squad. They were awkwardly standing close together, not exactly touching, but certainly not maintaining an appropriate distance considering their actions from today. Standing in a circle, Levi began assigning night watch and sleeping arrangements for the evening, making sure to put Eren with Eld and Gunther, and Oluo with himself and Petra. A little distance would do them some good, as would a good night’s rest to cool down whatever the hell was going on between them.

“Good, now Gunther takes first watch, and then Oluo will take second.” Levi let that hang in the air and was satisfied when nobody objected. They were too tired to really even care he thought, and the group began retreating for bed. It was only until Levi glanced over at Petra and Eren did he feel a twinge of something gnaw at his stomach. “Eren,” he began slowly, “what do you think you are doing?”

Holding Petra’s hand with a terribly visible vice-like grip, and shaking nonetheless, Eren began sweating bullets. Sweet Saint Maria, what in god’s name was he about to do? Was he really about to argue with the Captain? The man that beat the shit out of him to save him from a brutal torture session? The man who had killed countless titans without a hint of adversity? The man that was possibly about to finger his asshole for the first time ever…

“I-I…u-uh, I w-wanna sleep with Petra tonight!” he stammered, “I’m s-scared of the dark and back in training I always slept with my best friend Armin!” That little outburst caused everyone to stop in their tracks and look back in disbelief. Poor Petra just bit at her pretty bottom lip and looked at everything and everyone **but** Levi. The Captain himself felt his left eye twitch.

“Excuse me.” He said, not asked, causing the pair to break out into a cold sweat. “You, a titan in his own right, are afraid of the dark? And you need a sleeping buddy to make yourself feel safe?” Levi pointed at Petra who was squeezing Eren’s hand back with the same, if not more, intensity. “And what do you think about this Petra? Certainly you don’t think this is okay?”

“Um, well… I did offer my services in the first place, hehe?” She was in no better shape than Eren.

“So you two are telling me that a fifteen year old boy- no, no, soldier, can’t sleep in the dark with two other highly **skilled** and **lethal** comrades that outweigh Petra by more than half, and then decided to ask _her_ , out of everyone else in this group, to protect him from the boogeyman. I’ve got that straight, correct?” Dear god, they had the nerve to nod.

“You do know the biggest threat to humanity is right beyond those walls Eren? Not some make believe bullshit your parents told you to make you take your happy ass to bed on time!”

“B-but I’ve just always, uh…I dunno, _needed_ someone soft to sleep with?” Eren replied, well aware of the hole he had started digging getting bigger and bigger each time he opened his mouth.

Never in her life was Petra was more grateful to hear Oluo’s cackle than ever before. Everyone doubled over in a raucous, unfiltered roar that even threw the Captain off guard. The amount of noise they were making caused sleeping wildlife stir and cicadas to cease their evening songs.     

“You’re shitting me? Seriously?!” Oluo said in between breaths, trying, yet failing to compose himself. “We had a running bet that you were letting the little twerp hit it Petra! But instead you’re just like his _mommy!!!!_ ” Eld, who wasn’t a talker by any means, laughed so hard he fell on his ass and began crying, clutching at his midsection. Gunther stomped at the ground and was screaming ‘shut up, shut up’ every second he wasn’t laughing, pointing at Eren holding her hand. Petra clearly ruffled up like a hen in a coop and lashed out at her teammates who didn’t know a damn thing in the first place.

“That’s what’s wrong with men! You guys are always thinking about something dirty!!” She snatched her hand away from Eren’s and bum rushed Oluo, pushing him and pummeling him with her little fists. “And why in the hell would I mess around with a new, much younger recruit?! It’s not only terrible, but irresponsible and morally reprehensible!” The much larger man took the attack in stride and just endured while increasing in laughter. Petra’s face was bright red and her hair was a complete frizzy mess. “He’s fifteen for Sina’s sake! Of course he might be scared!! Don’t always take things to the god damn extreme!”

“So scared that he might wet himself like you did on _your_ first expedition?” Gunther interjected. Petra’s face only grew more aflame with embarrassment and anger. “I swear to god we thought you and Eren were screwing! Why else would you be acting like that!?”   

“S-shut up!” Eren rushed into the fray and pulled Petra by the midsection away from the cackling Oluo. She was about to pounce on Gunther, but there was no point in letting it get that far. If anyone was about to pee themselves it was going to be the three of them laughing and carrying on like that.

Levi, who was watching the scene with growing annoyance, saw the exact moment Eren’s hand had encircled Petra’s waist.  Why that didn’t sit well with him, he didn’t want to know, but almost like lightning, Levi grabbed Eren by his arm and Petra by her shoulder and yanked them away from each other. The absolute look of shock they each had only caused his anger to reach a head.

“Enough!” he yelled, “Compose yourself and take your asses off to bed!” He released the two and turned on his heel. “Gunther, take first watch and don’t be worthless and nod off on duty! Oluo, make the damn accommodations for Eren and shut the entire loving hell up. Move your shit and be up for the second half and make sure the fire doesn’t go out!” As he reached the mouth of the tent, he ripped open the flap and glared back at Petra and Eren.

“And you two, get over here, **_now_**.”


End file.
